The Socks Wanna Go Hunting

Bzzzt….bzzzt…bzzzt. Heidi groans as she rolls from her nice, warm bed to cross the room and turn off her alarm clock. Wiping gook from her eyes, she sleepwalks towards the bathroom, but stumbles over something hard. “Ouch! What the heck?”

Fumbling her way towards the light switch, Heidi gasps when the light reveals a posse of Sock critters armed with Robar rifles, complete with scopes. She swats at the red beam of light that appears to be aimed somewhere in the vicinity of her forehead.

“For Pete’s sake! Point that somewhere else!”

“Sorry,” Satan says unrepentantly. “Just practicing.”

“Go practice somewhere else,” Heidi tells him crossly. “No, wait. What are you guys doing, anyway?”

“Tonya invited us to go hunting with her and the first dude,” Stan tells her excitedly. “It’s part of kandemonkey’s grand plan.”

Heidi sits down hard on the side of the bed. “Grand plan for what?” she asks fearfully.

“We’re picking McCain & Co. off, one at a time,” Satan whispers out of the corner of his mouth. “The first dude thinks we’re going wolf hunting.”

“Oh God,” Heidi falls back on the bed. “You’re all going to get arrested. Or get me arrested. Or miss and shoot each other. I don’t know what’s worse. Are you sure this is kandemonkey’s idea?”

Stan scratched his head and looked at the others for help. Demon Dave shrugged. “Tonya said it was.”

“Do you guys never read Wikipedia? Tanya is a disaster on two legs.” Heidi informed them as she struggled upright. “I don’t think this is such a good idea.” She grabs Satan’s gun by the barrel. “Give me that.”

Satan tightens his grip. “Don’t be a spoilsport. I thought it sounded like a great idea. Kandemonkey needs all the help she can get.” The two fall to the ground. Demon Dave surrenders his gun, and Stan watches helplessly. A loud report is heard, and chunks of plaster from a sudden hole in the ceiling sprinkle the two with dust.

“ARGH. You just shot my ceiling!” Heidi screams, as with a final yank she pulls the rifle out of Satan’s hands.

“Great! Terrific! Now we’ve got to tell Tonya we can’t go,” Satan snarls.

Over by the window, Stan shakes his head. Headlights seem to spotlight him for a minute, and then they pass. “She’s already gone,” he said forlornly. “Now she’ll have the fun all to herself.”